happy 20, my love

Spouse Challenge on FB Day 7

Day 7 : Never a Dull Moment
One thing is for sure, my life changed forever the day I answered your ad in the City Pages. For better or for worse, and in spite of how we appear to others, I know our love is beyond measure. I am thankful for you, the boys we are raising together, the support you've given me when I had a crazy idea to get pregnant three more times, and for all that our future holds... Ditto, baby.

Spouse Challenge on FB Day 6

Day 6 : Kiss
I still remember our first kiss, as if it were yesterday. Standing outside the ice cream shop, wondering if he would like to see me again... and then it happened. No cannons or fireworks going off, but tender and sweet, cautiously optimistic of a second date lingering in the wind. He kissed me.

Spouse Challenge on FB Day 5

Day 5 : Father of MaBoys

Tender, stern, loving, sarcastic - all traits he possesses and is hopefully passing along to his boys. When I was pregnant with Oliver, we decided that JP should become an early-AM #maninbrown so he could also be a stay-at-home Dad. We would 'tag team' around 8:30 am every morning and I would head into work. This was not the easiest decision for me as I would have loved to trade places and stay home with my little boys in a heartbeat. But it worked, and I wouldn't have made a different decision to this day.

Spouse Challenge on FB Day 4

Day 4 : Adventure
We share a love of travel, he and me. Although HE is getting far pickier about returning to places we've once visited, it's certainly been an exciting adventure to gather up a few belongings and hit the road a few times each year. If we won the lottery, we'd travel abroad to many exotic and beautiful locales on our wish list; but until then, our journey has brought us to the occasional bed & breakfasts, on trips to meet friends across country, and weekly to a nearby bar stool for our cherished date night.

Spouse Challenge on FB Day 3

Day 3 Eye-to-Eye
We don't always see eye-to-eye and it was evident on our first date that we would always have something to talk (banter) about in our lifetime together. Our shared passions may be few and we are opposites in almost every imaginable way, but I wouldn't try to change him as that would make for a very dull marriage. We have grown to appreciate all that the other has to offer. A matched set, yin to my yang, Desi to my Lucy, Ralph to my Alice, Doug to my Carrie. He keeps me laughing, loving and on my A-game, every single day. <3 span="">

Through all of this craziness, madness and learning to love one another, we have successfully raised two wonderful young men.  I can only hope that they've learned by our example that LOVE and marriage can be shown and shared in many different ways. There are no set of rules you're handed when you decide to commit to one another... only that you will do your best to find balance, common ground and a shared love.  

Spouse Challenge on FB Day 2

I've been challenged to post pictures of ‪#‎miamour‬ for 7 days in a row... not that any of you want MORE of my posts in your newsfeed {giggle, snort}, but here goes! I will NOT be tagging anyone... so if this interests you, share the love and start your own 7 day trend!

Day 2 : The ProposalSummertime, baseball and cigars. Not a huge sports fan, but I really enjoyed going to a St. Paul Saints game. There's so much more to do than watch baseball. ;) We were joined by my parents at this game and before I knew it, I was hearing a proposal over the loud speaker during the 7th inning stretch. No ring, but a cigar band would do the trick. 1 year together somehow turned into 16, which is quickly approaching 20! Time flies when you're in love.

Spouse Challenge on FB Day 1

Figured I may as well use this opportunity to cross-post this week as I share about my relationship with my hubby.  So if you follow me or are friends with me there, you'll already know this information.  If not, my life is an open book (generally speaking) so I will share it here each day as well.

Alright, okay... I've been challenged twice now to post pictures of ‪#‎miamour‬for 7 days in a row... not that any of you want MORE of my posts in your newsfeed {giggle, snort}, but here goes! I will NOT be tagging anyone... so if this interests you, share the love and start your own 7 day trend!

Day 1 : Thanksgiving 1995
It was only the second time that I gathered with his 11 sibling family for an 'event' (after being slightly scared after the first big event introduction); but I came back and was welcomed with open arms! This memory also shows you how little Alek was when we started dating. Many things have changed since this date, but what holds true is the love I have for this man, more than twenty years later.

love is a gift

Another year between us,
this one sweeter than the last.

Why, you ask? 

Because after JP's recent health scare,
his HEART is still beating,
his lungs still breathing,
and he's been given another chance...

to live
to love
to educate
and to share
all that he is
and all that I fell in love with...  17 years ago.

Dearest John Paul,

 

So thankful. 

So very blessed. 

To have found you, in this lifetime, to love.

 

Happy Anniversary!

xo

john paul & geeky cool science

Well, the bottom part of this post will contain the "geeky cool science" parts.  The first half of this will serve to update on how our week started.  As I sit here in the family lounge listening to a Hmong interpreter talking with a loved one, two others conversing about their mother down the hall, I am trying hard to draw on the memory of the last 72 hours...  it's been a whirlwind!

Henry called me mid-afternoon on Monday, September 30, while I was in a work meeting, from his father's cell phone.  Of course, I didn't know it was Henry, but it's not like my phone to ring with calls from home, so I was apprehensive saying hello. 

"Mom, there's an ambulance here and Dad's not feeling well.  He's got chest pains."

{insert: MY heart suddenly, instantly, racing out of control...  and my feet, somehow springing my body into motion}

I immediately stopped what I was doing and started back for my desk.  I received a text from my neighbor letting me know she was at our house as well.  I sent a quick email to those I work for and I was out the door.  Texting, driving, and not sure which direction to head (home or hospital).  I know, I know.  Don't lecture me.  What would you do?  He was still in the house, I'm only 10 minutes away, and CHEST PAINS aren't exactly something to mess with, right?  So I kept an eye on my ever-changing messages and took a right turn...  heading to meet him at the ER.

I arrived shortly after he did.  Found an "un-named man" in room 10, who arrived by ambulance with chest pains.  It was JP.  My first question to the person getting him into a gown and tagged with do-hickeys (whatever those chest monitoring pads are called), "Do you have a cath lab on-site?"   Yes, yes they do. 

9 hours later...  still in the ER...  still not at a pain level zero, so not being moved upstairs.

I left to go home and be with the boys.  Reassure them Dad will be okay.  Everyone already on "prayer warrior" status.  He was in good hands, under an hour from {presumed} attack, and waiting on a confirmed diagnosis and treatment.

Somewhere after 9 pm, he was moved to ICU.  Pain level .05.  Yes, that's what he said.  Being feisty, impatient, and who knows if he was truthful, he finally landed somewhere other the uncomfortable ER bed.  Still no confirmed diagnosis.  Blood drawn.  Multiple doses of Nitrol, a few rounds of Morphine.  Have I mentioned he dislikes hates drugs?  No, I mean really.  He had previously been diagnosed with high cholesterol and was told to take Lipit0r.  Well, after a little searching on Dr. Google, he was put off by side effects and chose not to take the prescribed drug.

JP is healthy.  Exercises.  Eats right.  Adds jalapenos and hot sauce to everything.  He doesn't smoke, if you ask him.  He smokes cigars; doesn't inhale.  He does drink, both beer and "the brown stuff", as I so affectionately refer to it.

Heredity.  Period.  That's what gets him this far.  Ok, and the beer doesn't help (hopeful he will come to his senses and now change his ways in that regard), but if you saw him, you'd otherwise wonder why he ended up in the ER. 

Backing up:  He got back after his 10 mile bike ride, took a shower, couldn't stop sweating.  Lay down for a while, it didn't get better.  Sat on couch, looked in the mirror and was white as a ghost.  Sent Henry to the neighbor's for help.  She wasn't home.  JP then handed Henry the phone and told him to dial 911 and tell them his Dad was having chest pains.

Are you still with me?  Yeah, my story-telling will be a bit scattered.  Sorry.

No bed for me at the "Inn" (aka ICU), so I finally went home at 1 am on Tuesday morning (10 hours after arriving, leaving, coming back). 

Blood draw shows elevated levels of some kind of marker [insert proper wording later].  Six hours later, wee hours of the morning while I'm trying to sleep at home...

Confirmed heart attack. 

First day October
I get the boys off to school before heading back to the hospital.  I arrive about 6:30 am to JP just awaking.  Still had pain overnight, received more drugs, and another elevated reading of blood marker.  "They will fit him into the cath lab schedule" sometime today.  I understand scheduling, I do, but then suddenly JP is pounding touching his chest again in the sternum.  Pained look on his face, just as agitated and, from what I can tell, as much pain as when he presented over 12 hours earlier.  I am thankful that the internist, Dr. Jeff, is present.  I met Dr. Jeff at 12:45 am.  I look to him and tell him I'm not happy with JP's level of pain again and they push more drugs.  Ok, trying to stay calm, but WTF?!  Really?  more drugs to mask the symptoms?  Could we PLEASE DO SOMETHING about the underlying issue at hand?  Thankful for the mind-reading at this point, because as Dr. Jeff looks into my eyes, the drugs not working, he suddenly makes a decision to push this through as a 'stat' medical event and JP will be taken immediately to the cath lab.  Finally.

Well, let's just say that immediately wasn't quite as quick as it happened.  I decided that things in a hospital pretty much follow the military's motto of hurry up and wait - but at least we were moving toward resolution.

JP was wheeled down to the cath lab.  I followed along, and we parted ways in a back hallway somewhere.  Kissed him and off I went to wait.  My prior medical company employee status not able to play a part and get me into the tech room.  I was relegated to wait...  as the wife....  helpless.

I set my iphone timer as I sat down.

Thirty-three minutes.  That's all it took to discover, insert a stent and bring my husband to a relatively pain-free status.  Perhaps even less time, but that's when his name was called out to me in the waiting room and I stopped the timer.

Fast-forward to the cardiologist, Dr. Roh, talking with me about those 33 minutes.  Time that both dragged on and then flew by as I was praying.  Hoping.  Waiting.  I had not met, nor talked with him prior to this time.  He did not know my affinity or relation to my former employer.  Imagine my moment of utter, thrilled relief when he said they placed a Promus Element Plus stent into my husband's artery.  An artery that was 99% blocked, mind you.  holycrap.  "He will be feeling much better now", said Dr. Roh, and then he says, and I quote, "it's the best stent on the market".  I inform him that I previously worked at Boston Scientific for 11 years in quality/design assurance.  I know this product.  I know the team that worked on it. 

...................and exhale

Which brings us to today.
Prayers answered.  Miracles performed, by skilled doctors, with guidance from above (yes, He gets credit for this, in so many ways).  99% blockage of the mid-circ artery opened up by a product of modern science, coated with a drug that will release over the next 30 days and help keep away restenosis.

source

The stent

The Mynx Closure Device

A new man, having just celebrated double-nickels, with his boys by his side.  A few new lifestyle habits to incorporate, one of which includes taking a couple of drugs on a regular basis (he will learn to be okay with this).  We are blessed to have him with us another day.  We are so very thankful for modern medicine, skilled physicians, wonderful care attendants, a plethora of friends and neighbors who come to assist at a moment's notice, and all who have had even a thought or prayer for our family in the last few days.

We can only hope to continue paying it forward. 

One day, one breath, at a time.

 

 

{to be continued}

 

so much more to tell...

social media, large family, network of friends rallying to help, pastoral visits,

connection with woman taking ECHO, boys' reaction, neighbors pitching in,

connection to med device community, and thank you's

double nickels

 

To the one I love,

May your day be filled

with laughter,

love

and a few pints of beer.

 

xoxo

 

Happy Birthday JP!

not letting life pass me by

It's been a very busy month, this November 2012.  I'm not sure where the time has gone, but December starts tomorrow! I've got lots of post catching up to do and pictures to upload!  If you follow me on Facebook, you've seen some of the fun we've had as a family.  I'll be back when time slows down (ha), I promise!

This weekend will be filled with music - rehearsals, singing at service and two concerts on Sunday!  If you live nearby and need a nudge to get into the holiday spirit, come by Calvary and see us after the football game!  This is a wonderful show, filled with talented local musicians, and sure to warm your heart!

I have joined the chorus this year and look forward to my first year on stage again in many, many years!  I only wish I knew who would be sitting in the audience, taking my place, video-taping so I can share it with those who do not live nearby.  If I find a link to a video or two, I will be sure to link back for you!

The boys also have concerts coming up in December!  Oliver tells me he has a choir solo too.  I will update the side-bar this weekend with dates for family & friends interested in attending.

I just LOVE all that December brings

and cannot wait to be an active part of it.

Sweet 16

I answered his personal ad, in the printed City Pages.

We met for our first date at the Loring Bar & Cafe.

Without discussing our apparel prior,
we both wore white shirts and black shorts.

From the moment we sat down to dinner,
we shared a comfortable banter,
yes, banter,
back and forth,
taking turns,
listening,
chatting,
sharing.

We danced and listened to Polka music in the park.

He accepted me, and my young son, for who we were,
flaws and all.

I accepted him, siblings, large family and all,
for who they were.

Less than two years later,
he proposed over the 7th inning stretch.

It was easily apparent,
life would never be dull for us.

If we could put up love one another,
flaws,
family,
and all,
this would be a union,
only He could have crafted.

{Eighteen and}
Sixteen years married later,
our friends must wonder,
what is this thing they call love?

It's ours.
Ours alone.

And I would never trade him for another.

Happy Anniversary,
crazy,
snoring,
brown-stuff drinking,
cigar smoking,
loving,
hard working,
stay-at-home-dad,
man-in-brown
love of mine!

Sixteen years of wedded bliss.

xo

to the man I love...

You came to me at 38, one of eleven and a large Catholic family at that {said the Lutheran}.

The bachelor who toured with the Minneapolis Children's Theatre Company and sang singing telegrams {in a purple Speedo}, captured my attention 17 years ago.  I am so happy that you've found other ways to share your gift with the world, and I will never tire of listening to your beautiful voice. 

I didn't know what I was getting into, but I knew YOU were the one I wanted to play house with for the rest of my life.  I have been told you are the image of your father, whom I never met.  I am so very thankful to your parents for the man they raised.  I am blessed.

You make my heart skip a beat.

You fill our plates daily with lovingly-made, thoughtful nourishment.

You work very hard "in brown" in the mornings, so that in the afternoon you can make our house a home.

Your "honey-do" list, while still long, is never far from your daily tasks.

Your laughter can fill a room.

Your smile fills my heart.

The way you have raised our boys makes me proud.

Your unconditional love & support, while I fulfilled my dream and gave birth to three children who were not your own, was -  and still is - amazing!

And while our boys may say "we live in a house of sarcasm",

and some may not understand that banter = love @ 3513,
I am proud to say, I love every single minute of it... 

and

I love you!

xo

Happy Birthday, John Paul!



a celebration

JP and I started celebrating our birthdays back on Thursday, September 20th.  We had dinner in the bar at Benihana and enjoyed some yummy food with our $30 email gift.  It's one of those treats we look forward to sharing together every year.  They even allowed us to use them both at the same time.  Since the boys aren't adventurous enough yet to try it (and we didn't have a reservation for the hibachi table), it was nice enough to try something different and eat in the bar.

Saturday evening, we celebrated with good friends, Lorraine & Steve.  JP made a pork loin and sides, Lorraine brought the most scrumptious chocolate cake!  Everyone is still raving about it (and yes, we still have a small piece left for JP's birthday tomorrow).  Thanks to the cooks!

On Sunday, while the boys were watching their football, my Mother came over and we went to get a facial by my friend Tami, who sells MaryKay.  It was a nice little getaway and the decibel level was much more tolerable for an hour or so.

thanks for LIFE, Mom!

By Monday morning, it was nice not to worry about going to work.  I started my day with a long overdue appointment for a mammogram.  I couldn't believe how busy the waiting room was at 8:00 am on a Monday?!  Guess I'm not the only one who wanted to get it out of the way early in the week.  Because I have been pregnant the better part of the last five years, I haven't gotten one since my baseline at 40.  I haven't received a phone call yet (and it's now Wednesday), so I'm assuming all is good and a piece of paper will show up in the mail with normal results.

Grabbed my free cuppa java from Caribou, and headed home.

With the kids in school, JP and I ran a few errands and had lunch at Granite City.  When he asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and I said nothing, by the time we got home, I had changed my mind.  I told him I would really love it if we could take down the front tree.  Our beautiful Sugar Maple has begun dying a while ago, and each year it looks a little more sickly.  To my surprise, and probably because the weather was beautiful in the mid-70's, he agreed. squeeeee!  We then spent the better part of the afternoon sawing, chopping and hauling.  Not every girl's idea of a birthday present, right?  But I was elated to check this off the list.  And while it's not quite finished, we're much closer.  I am hopeful that it will be done in the coming weeks.  This doesn't mean that the "project" is finished, but that the branches are at least cut down and will not be staring back at me all winter.  The remaining trunk/stump will have a new purpose by next year...  you'll have to check back to see what will become of it.

our sad looking Sugar Maple

one last branch of color for Mister Chef

I got back to work on Tuesday and was greeted by a beautiful bouquet of flowers from Kara.  And home from work on Tuesday to another delivery of flowers all the way from Norway!

Another happy hour with my friend Ginny on Tuesday, and more celebrating continues throughout the week with JP's birthday on Thursday, and with friends Cheryl & Thad @ Surly coming up on Saturday! 

It's been a good week...  and we have so much to be thankful for...

A very big
thank you
to EVERYONE
who has made our week of celebration so wonderful!